「英語と私」(後編)【英語日記】
2009年10月02日 (金) | 編集 |
今日も朝、仕事が始まる前に「The Japan Times」を15分程度読み、昼休みは、昨日の放送分の「実践ビジネス英語」を15分聞きました。

まだ30分しか勉強していない・・・。

明日は、仕事が休みなので、本気で取り組まねば!

では、英語日記の後編です。
数年前に通信教育で添削してもらったものですが、私が間違った箇所と先生のコメントが参考になると思います。

※Original: 私の日記、Corrections: 先生の添削、Comments: 先生からのコメント

                「私と英語」(後編)

Original:
I majored in English linguistic in my junior college and there were seven native English teachers, mostly from the U.S. I was supposed to take Prof. Smith’s classes as one of the required subjects. I think he was so strict but I respect him a great professor.
 
Corrections:
I majored in English linguistics in my junior college and there were seven native English teachers, mostly from the U.S. I took Prof. Smith’s classes as one of the required subjects. I think he was so strict but I respect him as a great professor.
 
Comments: I changed “linguistic” to “linguistics”, because the plural form is usually used because linguistics includes many different parts of different languages. I changed “I was supposed to take” to “I took”, because “was supposed to take” sounds like you didn’t take the class. This phrase is often used when we didn’t do what we were supposed to do. For example, “I was supposed to come home before 11:00 pm, but I didn’t get back until 2:00 am!” Finally, I added the word “as” because you need “as” because you talk about the specific way that you respect him. If you didn’t add “a great professor” it would just be “I respect him”.
 
Original:
We had to take his lessons just in English. It was difficult for me because my English level was not good at that time. Writing reports in English were difficult for me too, so sometimes I submitted them in a halfway. Prof. Smith’s finally called me in his office and gave a scolding. He was seriously explained to me that the two years were so short to study English and I realized that I should do my best for my future.
 
Corrections:
We had to take his lessons just in English. It was difficult for me because my English level was not good at that time. Writing reports in English was difficult for me too, so sometimes I submitted them half-finished OR half in Japanese. Prof. Smith finally called me in his office and gave me a scolding. He seriously explained to me that the two years were so short to study English and I realized that I should do my best for my future.
 
Comments: I changed “were difficult” to “was difficult”, because “writing” is the subject and it is singular. It looks like you should use the plural because “reports” is plural, but “reports” is the object. You wrote “halfway”, but I didn’t understand your meaning. You could’ve meant that you wrote only half of a report or that the report was half English and half Japanese, so I wrote both options for you. I added “me” to be more specific that is was you he scolded. Finally, I removed “was” because you don’t need it because your verb is “explained”.
 
Original:
Then, I studied very hard and I really wanted to be a good student and communicate with him. Till then I liked English as a subject, but I’d come to like English as a communication tool. After my graduation, I decided to learn English as a lifetime work and continued to learn in many ways for about fifteen years. I sometimes found it difficult but I don’t want to give it up!
 
Corrections:
Then, I studied very hard and I really wanted to be a good student and communicate with him. Till then I liked English as a subject, but I’d come to like English as a communication tool. After my graduation, I decided to learn English as a lifetime career and continued to learn in many ways for about fifteen years. I sometimes found it difficult but I didn’t want to give it up!
 
Comments: I changed “work” to “career”, because in natural English “work” is mostly used as a verb, “I am working on a new project”, or as a place, “I am going to work”. In this case it’s more common to use “job” or “career”. However, because you said “lifetime” the best word is career, which is used to talk about a job that you plan to continue far in the future. In other words, a part-time job isn’t a career. Finally, I changed “don’t” to “didn’t” because the verb tenses in that sentence didn’t match. You could say “find” and “don’t” or “found” and “didn’t”
 
Ms. Mikeneko,
 
Thank you for sharing the rest of your story with me! You did much better with “a” and “the” this time. You really made very few mistakes in your essay, but if I have to pick one thing for you to look out for I would say verb agreement. In complex sentences, be sure that your verb matches the subject, and be careful not to change the verb tense in the middle of a sentence. Other than that, keep up the great work! I’m looking forward to your next essay!


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